Oh, nice. I went to Malaga. It was lovely.

I was golfing with Stephen Hawking.

He lied about his handicap.

Mind you, I never had to hire a golf buggy, I just sat in his lap.

Please, why do we have to be like this?

All this negative energy, come on!

we've got to work together so...

Do you know what,

that doesn't mean we have to like each other, does it? No. Sorry.

We both know we don't like each other, everybody knows that we are the Gallagher brothers of politics.

you're the fucking loutish prick.

That's a lovely analogy. You were the one who forced me out of the sodding band.

Come on, let's have a chat.

wouldn't fucking go, would you?

You had to hang on in there like a limpet up a whale's arse.

Why do you thrive so much on being disliked?

People hate me, good! Bring it on. Do know what they think about you?

I'm sure you're going to tell me. I'll tell you exactly what people say about you.

All right, go on then. Fuck all.

Oh, do they, fuck all? People have no fucking opinion about you.

You're like fucking Special K or fucking the Moody Blues.

That's you, white noise in the background. Do you find that funny?

No, I don't find anything you're saying funny whatsoever and I'll

tell you a home truth, Malcolm Tucker.

The people who are really hated in this country,

the people who are really hated are us, this government.

How about we stand together? Let's both be team players, shall we?

Were you the Einstein that OK'd this fucking Andy Murray thing at DoSAC

Times asking why the budget's been

pre-announced on Twitter by fucking Ryan Giggs.

Shit!

stats which DoSAC have published art unconfirmed projections."

Shit! That's DoSAC for you.

Come on, Malcolm, team players.

Bring me sunshine.

No, we are not manipulating the figures, somebody quite simply made a mistake.